Update

All right this is going to be really quick since I'm falling asleep right now and said I wasn't going to go on the computer.

All right I've seen about a million movies this past two months, and these movie are: Ghost Rider, Smokin Aces, Norbit, Zodiac, Wild Hogs and 300.

Nice line up right? Well I'm not going to go in to any EXTREME detail about any of them except for 300 [a full review will be up within the next day or so PROMISE]


Ghost Rider: 6 flaming ass skulls out of 10. No joke this movie blew, I've said this a million times all ready, it was like watching a high school production with that one kid that can act, you know, Nic cage, and the hot chick with the boobs, you know Eva Mendez. The action scenes we're top notch though.

Norbit: 5 more eddy Murphy movies where he puts on a fat suit and we all cringe out of 10. I won't say that I didn't enjoy this movie, but all in all this movie was ridiculously ridiculous! Other than Murphy's character Mr. Wong and the good Christian nature of Norbit, that's until he gets mad and tries not to curse, it's endearing on the boarder of annoying.

Smokin Aces: 9 badass mama jammas out of 10. This movie ROCKED, holy shit, with the bang! And the BOOM and the *gun noises* and the aww's and the STONED ASS JEREMY PIVEN! *squeels like a little girl*. Any action movie fan will love this movie, I mean the plot is simple, ok no I lied the plot is quite confusing and might take a while before you start going "Oooh". But here's the basic layout, mob wants guy dead, mob sends out hit for a million simloeans, best hitmen and women [MmMmMmm Alicia keys] show up, hillarity, violence, and sadness ensue. I can't even begin to tell you how many stars are in this movie, just go here, IMDb knows all. I will agree that some parts were a bit silly, but then again, it is an action movie, with a little bit of comedy and a little bit of gore.

Oh and I'm secretly [or not so secretly anymore] in love with Jeremy Piven [who plays the man the mob wants killed] and this line right here solidified my love for him:


"What do you see right now? You see exactly and only what I choose to show you. That is illusion Ivy that is the lie that I tell your eyes. Makin' the magic happen in the moment, in that split second. I can shape it, I can shift it, I can make it as real as this room. That is why I am valuable here Ivy and that is why you are not. I am sorry, I love you, I never wanted it to be like this, you know that. " -Buddy "Aces" Israel.

Zodiac: 8.5 HEY I LIVE IN VALLEJO'S out of 10. I loved this movie, although it was two hours long, there was enough suspense to keep it alive for those two hours. Yes there were parts where I wanted to punch Jake Gyllenhall in the face, not because he was bad in it, in fact I enjoyed him in this part, but his obsessive character added with his droning almost monotone voice would make me want to strangle anyone. Another couple good performances were by Mark Ruffalo, that's right Mark Ruffalo, I really hate this man, but after seeing him in this movie I have a new found respect for him... even if he did look a like Columbo.
Wild Hogs: 6 old dudes on Harley's our of 10. I don't want to say too much about this movie since it would give it ALL away. I'll say this, you got a boyfriend, you got a lesbian lover, you got a husband, take them to this movie; it's so chock full of macho and homophobia, it'll have your partner in stitches. Stars Tim Allen, Martin Lawrence, William H. Macy [Whom I ADORE] and John Travolta. There are a couple of cameos such as Ray Liotta [MEOW] as the leader of the biker gang that Travolta's character insults by cutting the gas lines on their bikes and accidentaly blowing up their bar. Oh did I give something away... it was funny anyway.

Tomorrow... 300!



-Jess